I started this post with a little recap of the holiday season for LWI, the shop opening, and the things I'm trying to do to find peace in the craziness. But if I'm being honest, that doesn't feel like what I want to share. If you follow us on social media, you know all the things we've been up to; the installs, the shop opening, the team activities.
But at the risk of being too vulnerable, I feel more inclined to share the duality of my own holiday feelings and what this time of year is really like. On one hand, it's not hard to get sucked into the flow of cozy, nostalgic music, lights, all the glowy, happy things. That's a happy place to be. But on the other hand, I can't shake the feeling of being like a quilt whose patchwork has been ripped open and stitched back together in a new way. Navigating yourself after the loss of a mother and two grandmothers all at the same time is such an odd thing. The whole matriarchy on which our family functioned vanished. There is for sure the missing them and the grief over what they are missing (mostly feeling that for my mom who was so young and had always been so healthy). But also the stepping up and into their roles, which at the holidays, is just a strange feeling. Being there for yourself and being there for your own grieving daughters, who are going through their own things, while carrying on keeping things festive is a real touch-and-go time. I recently read a quote that said something like "just because someone carries it well doesn't mean it's not heavy."
I share this because I know the holidays are bittersweet for many of us. If this is you, you're not alone. Here's to finding more light, peace and meaningful growth in 2024. Wishing you all a moment to catch your breath and care for yourself this holiday season.